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Andreas Preuss

Pasta (a la) Stradivari - special prize for the funniest answer!

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Horse (angel) hair pasta drizzled with a little oil infused with spruce tips and a hint of maple syrup. No wait, that can't be pasta a la Stradivari because it sounds horrible.

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This isn’t pasta, but my (non luthier) friend’s response concerning the mystical Stradivari varnish...

“The varnish is made by extracting the urine from a unicorn in South America, distilling it before adding coco paste as well as the tears from a lepricorn. Then it is fermented and left to sit in old whisky barrels, then you freeze the barrel with liquid nitrogen and crack it open take the frozen block and place it near to the house of Morgan freeman where for a year he will speak to it everyday. after this it is heated to 42 degrees and shouted at by Brian blessed. It is distilled once more and packaged in a metal bottle made from metal found on comets.”

this is a good laugh between us as it contains a few subtle inside jokes.

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Just remember that to be considered historical, the recipe shouldn't have any pasta in it.  IIRC, pasta was an occasional delicacy of the aristocracy during Stradivari's time.

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This is a great idea! I’m having trouble coming up with an answer, but I’ll give it some thought. I propose that all recipes that are possible to make be posted and tested, then put to a vote on Maestronet.

The winner of the poll can have a dish sent to the acoustics guys for analysis and they can come up with all kinds of charts and graphs, then everyone can engage in philosohical arguments about the working methods of the chefs, the design principles, the specificity of local ingredients, whether or not electrical appliances are acceptable,and how it stacks up in blind testing. One it’s done, it can be sent to a top violin expert for a certificate of authenticity.

Seriously, though, I’d love to see some recipes that I could actually make for fun.

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Sunday "Bronx" gravy...my mother's recipe

San Marzano whole tomatoes, puree, and paste. Garlic, onions, pork neck bones, Italian sausage and meatballs. 

Simmered for several hours and served over the pasta....ah...fit for a king

.

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...I have made the perfect Italian Stradivari Pasta - and I've even improved it with a touch of German brilliance.

Now I just have to let it sit in the pot for 300 years.

Stay tuned...

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It's a Family Recipe. Sworn to secrecy upon the grave of my dearly departed grandmother, we can not share it with you.

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20 hours ago, jacklinks said:

Regardless of what the ingredients are, the recipe label will be fake. The ingredients will be “the usual” ones from Germany.

Knowing the ingredients isn't enough in making an authentic dish. Knowing how to use them is the real secret....anyone can make noodles and ketchup.

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Oh, I don't know... probably something that comes in a can (I don't cook).

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One part spruce, one part maple, one part varnish, one part artistic savant,  one part hype,  one part hero worship, one part financial vested interest,  One part spaghetti noodles,   bring to boil,  reduce heat and simmer for three hundred years.   

yummy

oh...   go to America, discover tomatoes,  make sauce...

Edited to remove the sarcastic cynical part  heh :ph34r:

 

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Spaghetti Stradivari - $100.01
Spaghetti was an occasional delicacy for aristocracy like yourself in the time of Stradivari.  The original recipe, imitated but never surpassed, was thought to be lost until its rediscovery by our pseudo-culinary expert.  Painstakingly smothered in vibrant, glowing sauce the color of the evening sun.  Perhaps the most important secret is the sauce!  3/4 kid's menu available.

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9 minutes ago, MikeC said:

One part spruce, one part maple, one part varnish, one part artistic savant,  one part hype,  one part hero worship, one part financial vested interest,  One part spaghetti noodles,   bring to boil,  reduce heat and simmer for three hundred years.   

yummy

oh...   go to America, discover tomatoes,  make sauce...

Don't think I'll ever be able to top that.:)

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Quote

special prize for the funniest answer!

Blind testing will reveal that no one can reliably determine which answer is funniest (let alone agree).

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12 minutes ago, Marty Kasprzyk said:

I don't anything about his recipe but I think he used spaghetti to generate his arch shapes.

pasta  arches.jpg

For outlines,  might have been based on the radii of Stadivari's hot-plate in the background. ;)

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120 Neapolitan chicken eggs

222 cups Brecian flour,

2lbs teaspoon Venetian salt

32 gallons Tyrolean wine 3 quarts for the pasta,,,, the rest for the wife, and varnish maker.

17 lbs Etruscan ricotta cheese,

shovel full or two of Moluccaian nutmeg

7 cups Cremonese chestnuts

1/2 teaspoon  Milanese parsley (Strad thought he was allergic to it, turns out it was the ebony)

4 gals of fresh milk from Florentine

12 sheep, save the intestines,

4 logs of Carpathian maple,

4 logs of the finest pine,

All the ebony he could afford,

16 tons of glue.

Have the wife make it,, invite the varnish maker over for dinner,

Cut the logs and make fiddles.

 

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